BROADSTONE

How the State Leads People to Their Own Destruction | Robert Higgs

2011-11-13T12:26:00.000-08:00

So little to say, so much to say . . .

2009-07-05T14:31:00.000-07:00

I have about 30+ hours until the end of my training. That is about 3 days driving. I have decided to team drive with a buddy of mine who went through CDL training and is also out on the road getting his 300+ hours.

By the end of next week I expect that we'll be testing out, getting assigned a truck (I hope it's a new Pete!) and getting dispatched for our first official run. I am pretty stoked about it.

Training has been fun, interesting, frustrating, fulfilling and exhausting. I'm glad it's coming to an end. The main reason is that I am ready to start making real pay instead of training pay . . . which is seriously next to nothing.

Anyway, that's the news.

Life On The Road

2009-05-25T14:58:00.001-07:00

I was out on the road for seven days with my trainer, Needham Babb. He is 30 years old and has been with Werner for 2 years. He is the son of a son of a trucker. He's been driving big trucks since he was a little boy. Really. Some of his earliest memories are those of riding in the truck with his dad. Though he never really thought he'd be trucking for a living, having a family and being good at the job convinced him it was the right move to make.

In our journey across America I've learned the gentle art of "floating" gears which means not using the clutch pedal and getting the rpm's at the right place to nudge or pull the gear shifter into the right gear. There is a lot of finesse to this. Finesse in a big rig is not exactly what you might expect but it takes just the right amount of momentum and torque to get a tractor and trailor moving while putting a gear in it's groove without putting too much or too little engine speed.

We left Atlanta and drove through Alabama, Mississippi, Louisiana, Texas and ended up in Los Lunas, New Mexico. I was driving about 10 or 11 hours each day. My weakest area is backing. That will come with time and experience. Hopefully none of that experience will include running into anything and damaging equipment. That would be really really bad.

Tuesday we set out for Orlando, Florida. I have some friends in that area. Who knows? Maybe I'll get to see them.

That's all for now.

Patience

2009-05-12T10:12:00.000-07:00

I just talked with my trainer. The plant he's loading from is now operating again but will not have him ready until tomorrow at 10 a.m. Now, I could speak with my manager and request the most available trainer but I don't want to do that just yet. This trainer is from Chattanooga which means I'll be able to be "home" when he goes home for break. So, given the payoff, I'll wait it out until tomorrow. So, once again, paid vacation but it sure is boring.

On being nice . . .

2009-05-12T07:02:00.000-07:00

Some things I've learned very recently (like 15 minutes ago):

It's always better to be nice.

Assume the best about others. I probably wouldn't want others assuming the worst about me and would very much like having others assume the best about me.

I need to hold my tongue more often than not.

I need to listen with my heart as well as my ears.

There is usually a safe exit to walk away from trouble.

God does the judging, not me.

Reassigned

2009-05-12T04:42:00.000-07:00

I've been reassigned a new trainer. This will be #3 in one week and hopefully I will actually train with this guy. Al (the trainer I tried hard to get) had to sit in Chicago for 27hrs and so they gave a new guy who is sitting 60 miles out waiting to get loaded since yesterday. He's actually at his load but something is screwy at the place. Yesterday at 11 a.m. he called and said it would be 5 to 6 hours. 5 to 6 hours later he called back and said it might be another 5 to 6 hours. I laid down in my incredibly comfortable bed (not) and decided to get a little shut-eye. 8 hours later I awake to the beautiful sunlight and am freaking out a little bit thinking maybe he'd called and I'd missed his call. So, I call and can tell I've just woke him up. Poor guy. I'm getting paid to wait at the hotel. He's not getting paid to sit for a day and a half. He said he'd definitely see me later today. We'll see. If so, we'll be taking his load to Texas and then pick up for another load to New Mexico. And, I'll get a lot of driving time going west.

I guess some dudes might be really ticked off and feel yanked around. Me? I suppose if I were to get upset it wouldn't change anything except my ability to enjoy the moment. I can't change much in my circumstance right now except my attitude towards it. And again, there are some positives. First and most obvious, I've already stated: I'm getting paid. Second, I'm in an air conditioned hotel, have a semi-soft bed, I don't have to worry about anyone elses safety and I am enjoying getting some quiet to read. Third, I've had the chance of meeting other truckers while at the hotel and terminal. There is definitely a certain "brotherhood" (and sisterhood) among the guys here since we are all in the same industry and have accepted the trucker lifestyle. There are plenty of truckers with stories to tell. Sometimes the BS-oh-meter goes off, but there is still a lot to gain from the stories and friendships. These are the same dudes and dudettes I'll be driving beside on the road. Better to make friends now and have some lifelines out there if I need help somewhere down the road.

I hope to be writing from Dallas, TX next time I write. Cheers!

"IF YOU PERSUADE YOURSELF . . .

2009-05-11T07:05:00.000-07:00

"If you persuade yourself that you can do a certain thing, provided this thing be possible, you will do it, however difficult it may be. If, on the contrary, you imagine that you cannot do the simplest thing in the world, it is impossible for you to do it, and molehills become for you unscalable mountains." Emile Coue

smile.

2009-05-09T13:49:00.000-07:00

My trainer is in Chicago waiting to get dispatched for a load. If he has to wait too long they'll reassign me to another trainer. I hope not. I got a recommendation for this guy and had to scuttle butt to make it happen. If all goes well he'll pick me up Monday. Until then, can someone say, "Paid vacation."?

Catch 22

2009-05-06T16:58:00.000-07:00

Orientation was fast. A ridiculous amount of information was compacted into one hour or two hour segments with 10 minute breaks in between each segment, twelve hours a day. My feeling at every blearing of the eyes and nodding of my head was that if they'd just given the material to us and said, "Read this, sign-off on it", then the creeping death of minutes could have been reduced and orientation taken only one day instead of two. And, they could cut their budget. But, from the company's perspective it is probably a matter of CYA Policy.

The DOT physical was a conveyor of men peeing in cups, bending over and reaching to somehow touch their toes, turning and coughing this way and turning and coughing the other way. All the while each was hoping they were not too anxious as to raise their blood pressure and fail the physical. The nurses and Dr. were a bland but irritable sort. I suppose passing cups of pee between men and women can be more than a little coy and uninteresting.

At the hotel men, and a few women, wait and wonder about smoking and hold conversations at liars tables. Those who are between trainers describe experiences and trainers and everything said is always entirely true and spoken with blood earnest. Only about half is ever believed and the other half is re-embellished by the hearers, but no one ever says so.

Those of us who have no idea or category whereby to compare interpret all that is said with minds already adept at reading tea leaves. We have no idea what to expect on the road. But, what would you expect?

I'm reading "Catch 22" and it is ironic and funny. I am listening to music on iTunes. I am trying to eat healthy and drink water instead of yellow chemical that tastes sweet and is amazingly addictive.

I have been here three days and already have a new roomate. The other roomate had to leave unexpectedly but will hopefully be back soon.

In a day or two I expect to receive a call from a Driver/Trainer who will say, "Have your bags packed I'll be there in . . ." Then, I'll drive and ride. I hope to do well. I hope to not grind gears.

Still, I'm excited. I have no regrets in choosing this path. I'm ready for the road. Is the road ready for me?

We're on our way

2009-05-03T07:04:00.000-07:00

This morning was a tearful goodbye to Heather and the boys. Later, my folks will take me to the Greyhound station where I will go to Atlanta, GA for orientation at Werner Enterprises. After two days I will connect with a Trainer and ride with them anywhere and everywhere in the US of A. I have a mixture of nervousness and excitement. And, I have sadness because I'll really miss Heather and the boys.

As much as possible, this blog will be an over-the-road blog which is particularly for my family to keep up with me and secondly for anyone else who happens to be interested in the life of a newbie OTR Truck Driver.

drop and hook

2009-04-30T01:11:00.000-07:00

There Will Be A Day

2009-02-26T09:47:00.001-08:00

There Will Be A Day--Jeremy Camp

I try to hold on to this world with everything I have
But I feel the weight of what it brings, and the hurt that trys to grab
The many trials that seem to never end, His word declares this truth,
that we will enter in this rest with wonders anew

But I hold on to this hope and the promise that He brings
That there will be a place with no more suffering

There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place, will be no more, we’ll see Jesus face to face
But until that day, we’ll hold on to you always

I know the journey seems so long
You feel your walking on your own
But there has never been a step
Where you’ve walked out all alone

Troubled soul don’t lose your heart
Cause joy and peace he brings
And the beauty that’s in store
Outweighs the hurt of life’s sting

I can’t wait until that day where the very one I’ve lived for always will wipe away the sorrow that I’ve faced
To touch the scars that rescued me from a life of shame and misery this is why this is why I sing….

There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place, will be no more, we’ll see Jesus face to face

There will be a day, He’ll wipe away the stains, He’ll wipe away the tears, He’ll wipe away the tears…..there will be a day.

Jaco Pastorius and John Scofield - The Chicken

2009-02-12T22:17:00.000-08:00

Will Work For Food. Really. No, really, I will work for food.

2009-02-08T21:14:00.000-08:00

Ironic, I know.

Jesus Is Praying for Me

2009-01-20T20:44:00.000-08:00

It was snowing when I left the Hardees restaurant. The wind had kicked up and was blowing into my face. The people walking past me into the restaurant might have been wondering if my eyes were watering from the cold or because I was crying. If they had heard the General Manager telling me that they could not hire me and heard how desperate for a job I was they might have concluded that I was crying for this reason. But, they would have been wrong. But, neither was it the wind and snow.

It has not been an easy couple of months for us. If you know my story, then you know the story. If you don't, I'm sure you have your own story one way or another.

These days I am unemployed. I've never been unemployed in my entire working life. In 1988 I began working for Chick-Fil-A and since then I have always had a job earning money. I've never had a difficult time getting a job. I have quit jobs one day and been hired the very next day. It is a confidence I've never lacked.

Over the last few months I have sent out perhaps 200 copies of my resume and contacted dozens of people I know and others on my behalf have contacted dozens of others they know. I have been offered one job which paid too little to support my family. Otherwise, I have been insulted during interviews, laughed at regarding my qualifications and ignored by many others who have simply not bothered to return my attempts. I've had some criticize and say that perhaps I am not trying hard enough. But, I've had many, many who have assured me that I will certainly get a job and not to worry about it.

I've had many dark thoughts and hopeless feelings. Questions without answers. Prayers full of angst. I've wondered about God's purpose and plan. I've repented many times of a bitter heart. And, I've reminded myself many times that my problems are not as big as other peoples problems.

Heather quoted something from James MacDonald today that stayed in my mind all day

"I remember this quote from my college years: "If you could hear the Lord praying for you in the next room, you would not fear a thousand enemies."

It's a great quote. I knew it was when I heard it. It stuck in my brain. But, not my heart. That's been the most difficult thing lately. I had a dream a week ago and in it my older brother had just helped me pack my belongings into moving trucks, again! That is a bad dream in and of itself. But, in my dream my brother was holding my hand and saying to me, "God must have a really good reason for letting you go through this hard time." In my head I knew he was right. In my heart I was resisting. He wouldn't let go of my hand until he saw in my eye that I got it in my heart. So, in my dream I turned away from him and pulled my hand away and walked to the truck which I was driving with all my belongings. I knew I needed this to be true in my heart but I just couldn't muster it up on my own. Ironically, I woke from that dream really encouraged. I really appreciated God letting me have a dream like that. Then, the next day during an interview "the Employer" laughed at my qualifications and thought I was crazy to expect more pay than they were willing to offer. I felt like Charlie Brown. I got a rock.

Anyway, this quote Heather gave me today was still with me. On my way home from Chattanooga today I stopped at McDonald's. Not hiring. I stopped at Krystal's. Not hiring. I stopped at Long John Silver's. Not hiring.

I stopped at Hardees. Which is a very interesting place in the South because it is mainly a Southern experience. If you are from the South you understand Hardees. Tonight, there was a Gospel Quartet with mandolin, harmonica, guitar and stand-up bass. It was very old school.

After I finished speaking with the General Manager a woman came up to me and said, "Kelly? Aren't you Kelly Bridenstine?" She looked really familiar. She was smiling and so happy to see me and of course had gotten my name right, so I gave her a hug and said, "Yes, I'm Kelly but you'll have to help me with your name." She laughed and said, "I thought it was you. I remembered your eyes." I laughed at that. Her name was Joy. About 15 years ago I worked with her at the Dayton Wal-Mart when I was working 3rd shift putting together equipment for the Garden Center outside during the winter. One other winter I'll never forget.

She asked what I was up to. I held out the Hardees application. She said. "You still haven't found a job?" I shook my head. I felt the heat in my face. I could tell she felt sorry.

The next thing she said floored me, "Well, we've been praying for y'all. My church has been praying for you and your family." I couldn't believe it. How did she know? She mentioned how she'd found out and then the next thing she said stunned me again, "Kelly, there are several churches around here praying for you. A lot of us been gettin' folks to pray." I told her I didn't know so many people were aware. I was a little embarrassed and deeply touched. My eyes were beginning to moisten.

And then she said, "We all love you. But, most importantly Jesus loves y'all too. Don't you forget that. He loves you most of all." And then like a giant billboard my mind remembered the quote I'd struggled to work into my heart,

If you could hear the Lord praying for you in the next room, you would not fear a thousand enemies."

I was definitely getting teary at this point. Sad, happy and in a state of wonderment all at the same time. She tried to make small talk and hugged me when we both realized I just couldn't open my mouth without getting slobbery. She said they'd keep praying for us and to hang in there.

It was snowing when I left the Hardees restaurant. The wind had kicked up and was blowing into my face. The people walking past me into the restaurant might have been wondering if my eyes were watering from the cold or because I was crying. If they had heard the General Manager telling me that they could not hire me and heard how desperate for a job I was they might have concluded that I was crying for this reason. But, they would have been wrong. But, neither was it the wind and snow.

It was because Jesus loves me and is praying for me.

"25 Consequently, he is able to save to the uttermost those who draw near to God through him, since he always lives to make intercession for them.
26 For it was indeed fitting that we should have such a high priest, holy, innocent, unstained, separated from sinners, and exalted above the heavens. 27 He has no need, like those high priests, to offer sacrifices daily, first for his own sins and then for those of the people, since he did this once for all when he offered up himself." Hebrews 7:25-27

Before the throne of God aboveI have a strong, a perfect plea:

A great High Priest, whose name is Love,

Who ever lives and pleads for me.

My name is graven on his hands,My name is written on his heart;

I know that while in heaven he stands

No tongue can bid me thence depart

No tongue can bid me thence depart.

When Satan tempts me to despair,

And tells me of the guilt within,

Upward I look, and see him there

Who made an end of all my sin.

Because a sinless Savior died,

My sinful soul is counted free;

For God, the Just, is satisfied

To look on Him and pardon me

Hallelujah! Hallelujah!

Praise the One,Risen Son of God!

Behold him there, the risen Lamb

My perfect, spotless righteousness,

The great unchangeable I am,

The King of glory and of grace!

One in himself, I cannot die

My soul is purchased by his blood

My life is hid with Christ on high,

With Christ, my Savior and my God

Prayer Guide – Where is My Fear?

2009-01-20T10:27:00.000-08:00

Prayer Guide – Where is My Fear? –

January 21, 2009”If I be a master, where is My fear? Saith the Lord” (Mal. 1:6, KJ).

Thursday, January 22 – Seek the Lord’s mercy and forgiveness for the irreverence and disrespect of God found in the North American church. Ask God to restore us to a holy fear of Him.
“. . . If then I am a Father, where is My honor? And if I am a Master, where is the [reverent] fear due Me? Says the Lord of hosts . . .” (Mal. 1:6, AMP)

Friday, January 23 – Plead for God’s mercy and pardon for our sins of hating knowledge and not choosing the fear of the Lord. Ask God to grant us a fresh vision of Him in His holiness that would help us under all circumstances and at all times to be deeply conscious that He is present. Ask God to implant in us a wholesome dread of displeasing, disobeying, or dishonoring Him.
“Because I called and you refused . . . and no one paid attention . . . and did not want my reproof, I will also laugh at your calamity . . . Then they will call on me, but I will not answer; They will seek me diligently, but they will not find me. Because they hated knowledge and did not choose the fear of the LORD” (Prov. 1:24-29, NASB).

Saturday, January 24 – Entreat God’s mercy and forgiveness for the way we have forsaken our duty to esteem and dread Him by explaining the fear of the Lord as being reverence and respect alone. Seek the Lord’s grace to help us understand what biblically it means to fear the Lord.
“Know therefore and recognize that this is an evil and bitter thing: [first,] you have forsaken the Lord your God; [second,] you are indifferent to Me and the fear of Me is not in you, says the Lord of hosts” (Jer. 2:19, AMP).

Sunday, January 25 – Ask the Lord to help us to understand that in all we do and say that we live under His scrutiny and to grant us a deep and reverential sense of our accountability before Him.
“For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may be recompensed for his deeds in the body, according to what he has done, whether good or bad. Therefore knowing the fear of the Lord, we persuade men . . .” (2 Cor. 5:10-11, NASB).

Monday, January 26 – Implore the Lord to inspire us to fear Him that we would have hearts that shun evil, fear sinning, and keep His commands.
“O that there were such an heart in them, that they would fear me, and keep all my commandments always, that it might be well with them, and with their children for ever” (Deut. 5:29, KJ).

Tuesday, January 27 – Seek the Lord’s grace to cause us to be willing to work out our salvation with fear and trembling and to enable us to bring ourselves under His rule by obedience to His word.
“The conclusion, when all has been heard, is: fear God and keep His commandments, because this applies to every person” (Eccl. 12:13, NASB).

Wednesday, January 28 – Beseech the Lord to grant His Spirit to rest upon us and to make the fear of the Lord our delight that we would make all our judgments with the awareness that we are standing in His holy presence.
“And the Spirit of the Lord shall rest upon Him–the Spirit of . . . the reverential and obedient fear of the Lord–and shall make Him of quick understanding, and His delight shall be in the . . . fear of the Lord” (Isa. 11:2-3, AMP).

A not so scholarly post

2009-01-09T22:27:00.000-08:00

My friend Jamie called me today. He's like, "Dude, why haven't you called me?" I'm like, "What? What's the problem." He's like, "I called and left you a message 4 days ago. What's the deal?" I'm like, "Dude, I don't get reception on my cell out here in Spring City. You'll have to use the land line."

He says, "Anyway, the reason I called is . . . Did you know that Phish is getting back together?" I says, "No, really? That's cool." He says, "Yeah, the closest show they have booked so far is in Asheville, N.C. We could drive down and see the show. They'll probably never play together again." Meanwhile I'm looking up ticket prices online as he is speaking to me. It's in June. Tickets are $50.

My wife is like, "Ummm, you know we don't have any money right now." I say, "Really, you're kidding? Hmmmm, I'll get Jamie to buy the tickets and I'll tell him I'll pay him back."

I'll post a picture with some inane comments if we end up going. I hope we go.

3 Brothers

2009-01-09T11:20:00.000-08:00

My wife informs me that I should write something with this picture. I don't know what to say, really. She said, "People like to read something written with a picture." This picture was taken amidst great laughter and enjoyment at my mom and dad's house on Christmas Day (I snagged it from my brother Steven and his wife's website). This was definitely one of the highlights of my time during the holiday season. Being back "home" with family and friends is a huge blessing and encouragement these days.

2008-12-30T20:07:00.000-08:00

...Christ did not appoint professors, but followers. If Christianity ... is not reduplicated in the life of the person expounding it, then he does not expound Christianity, for Christianity is a message about living and can only be expounded by being realized in men's lives.
From Kierkegaard's Diary, ed. Peter P. Rohde, trans. Gerda M. Anderson (New York: Philosophical Library, 1960), 141 (1848)

THANKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-12-16T11:30:00.000-08:00

Here is a picture of Pastor Derik Durham of Mount Salem (on right) and his Deacon Kyle (on left) who spent all of their Saturday helping us get loaded. Thanks guys!

And, of course, thanks to both our families for all of the amazing support and encouragement; my dad and brother Lee helping unload. Mike and Wendell meeting me at 2 o'clock Saturday morning to unload the first load. Breakfast at Cracker Barrel was a blast!

I especially want to thank all the other brothers and sisters in the Lord who have prayed and reached out in very practical and substantial ways during this difficult time. Your outpouring of love and material support has been a reminder of God's love and concern. God places His Church, His People to be a visible and physical witness to the reality of God's grace in Christ Jesus --- All of you have been just that! May the Lord repay you for all of your kindness.

The Crowded Path To Leadership

2008-12-11T22:42:00.000-08:00

"There will always be more people willing to do ‘great’ things for God than there are people willing to do the little things. The race to be a leader is crowded, but the field is wide open for those willing to be servants." - Rick Warren

Traveling Mercies

2008-12-11T18:11:00.000-08:00

Please be praying for us and our families. They will be driving up from Tennessee to help us move back down.

A Right View of God --- Prayer Guide

2008-12-09T17:58:00.000-08:00

Prayer Guide – A Right View Of God – December 10, 2008
“God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in spirit and in truth” (John 4:24, NIV).

Thursday, December 11 – Implore the Lord to grant a reviving encounter with Him that would change the way we think about Him and bring back a fear, awe, and reverence for who He is.	“Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe, for our ‘God is a consuming fire’" (Heb. 12:28-29, NIV).
Friday, December 12 – Seek grace to repent of re-imaging God, making Him look less severe and distorting what He is like to make us more comfortable in our sin.Ask God to restore biblical worship in our lives. Beg Him to revive us to form and project a correct image of God to one another and to the world.	"You worship what you do not know; we worship what we know . . . The true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth; for such people the Father seeks to be His worshipers” (John 4:22-23, NASB).
Saturday, December 13 – Implore God to grant us a willingness to repent of offering Him worship while we overlook questionable things taking place in our midst that do not follow the scriptures. Beg God to enable us through His Spirit’s guidance to make the changes needed to spend more time getting to know Him through His word. Ask Him to bring us through a repentance that captivates us with His glory.	“To what purpose is the multitude of your sacrifices to Me [unless they are the offering of the heart]? says the Lord. I have had enough of the burnt offerings . . . [without obedience] . . . Bring no more offerings of vanity (emptiness, falsity, vain glory, and futility) . . . I cannot endure--[it is] iniquity and profanation, even the solemn meeting . . . I am weary of bearing them” (Isa. 1:11-14, AMP).
Sunday, December 14 – Plead with the Lord to help us return to the scriptural definition and practice of worship. Ask Him to restore worship that causes us to compare what we do with the scriptures and cleanses us of comparing ourselves with one another. Beg the Lord to empower prophets who will declare to us what God is like from the scriptures.	“. . . Present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God” (Rom. 12:1-2, KJV).
Monday, December 15 – Beg God to help us understand that when Israel profaned His name and gave the world an unbiblical view of Him that He brought severe discipline upon them in front of the nations.	“I will vindicate the holiness of My great name which has been profaned among the nations, which you have profaned . . . ‘when I prove Myself holy among you in their sight’” (Ezek. 36:22-23, NASB).
Tuesday, December 16 – Make haste to beseech the Lord to forgive us for profaning His name by prayer, preaching, and singing that re-images Him.	“Moses made haste to bow low toward the earth and worship” (Ex. 34:8, NASB).
Wednesday, December 17 – Ask God to bring us back to God-centered, God glorifying worship based on truth, not trends, which produce reverence and awe in us.	^“God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in spirit and in truth” (John 4:24, NIV).

“I have been so blessed to be here that at times I think I will burst!”

2008-12-03T13:28:00.000-08:00

Kissing Retirement Goodbye

By John EnsorDecember 3, 2008

John Ensor is the Executive Director of Urban Initiatives forHeartbeat International and author of The Great Work of the Gospel.

* * *

I kissed retirement goodbye—at least the kind traditionally planned for in America. My mother has finally persuaded me that there are better things to do when I reach her age.

In August, I wrote about caring for family with end-of-life challenges. My mother, at 78, started to go blind while on a mission trip to Mongolia. Her sight was saved through high-dose steroids, which tripped other health concerns which were compounded by the discovery of breast cancer.

The subsequent surgery left her fragile. She fell and added injury to sickness and disease. We gathered with her in August to discuss how to care for her as she enters what I call “the frowning years.”

Ecclesiastes calls them plainly “the evil days” when

the years draw near of which you will say, “I have no pleasure in them”; before the sun and the light and the moon and the stars are darkened and the clouds return after the rain in the day when the keepers of the house tremble, and the strong men are bent, and the grinders cease because they are few, and those who look through the windows are dimmed, and the doors on the street are shut—when the sound of the grinding is low, and one rises up at the sound of a bird, and all the daughters of song are brought low—they are afraid also of what is high, and terrors are in the way; the almond tree blossoms, the grasshopper drags itself along, and desire fails, because man is going to his eternal home, and the mourners go about the streets. (12:1-5)

The point of this description is to “remember your creator in the days of your youth” (12:1). I take this to mean:

Taste and see the goodness of God while all your senses are in full function, and your strength is still intact.

Savor him while you can—before your teeth fall out (the grinders cease) and your eyes fail (the windows are dimmed) and your bones ache with every move (the grasshopper drags itself along); before the fears of dying assail you and sap your strength and try your faith one last time before they are swallowed up in victory.

Evidently, at 78, my mother is still in the days of her youth. Since August, she has prayed and fought for her health.

Last week she left for Quetzaltenango, Guatemala. She joined a team of trainers for a Leadership Development Conference in which 90 teachers from around the country took their school vacation week to learn to study and teach the Bible through an inductive-study method. Seven more teachers planned on being there.

But my mother writes, “They did not get here because their charter bus was ambushed by robbers and the driver was killed.”

In spite of such things, she writes of the thrill of watching teachers learn to read out of the Bible its unsearchable riches rather than read into it preconceived notions.

She concludes, “I have been so blessed to be here that at times I think I will burst!” Evidently, she intends to die with her mission boots on as she faces down those “frowning years.”

Permissions: You are permitted and encouraged to reproduce and distribute this material in any format provided that you do not alter the wording in any way and do not charge a fee beyond the cost of reproduction. For web posting, a link to this document on our website is preferred. Any exceptions to the above must be approved by Desiring God.

Please include the following statement on any distributed copy: By John Piper. © Desiring God. Website: desiringGod.org

Satan's Stomping Ground

2008-11-29T20:57:00.000-08:00

Hard hearts give Satan sure footing. They are his stomping ground. Soft, tender and maleable hearts which are given to the Lord become like quicksand to Satan. And, without sure footing the Devil will seek another hard place on which to make his stand.

Oxford Professor Faces "New Atheism"

2008-11-28T10:13:00.000-08:00

See here

HT: Justin Taylor

In the Leaves

2008-11-28T07:58:00.001-08:00

Here's the new dude!

2007-11-24T03:52:00.001-08:00

This is Elijah Daniel Bridenstine.

8lb's and then some.

The Torah Story: An Apprenticeship on the Pentateuch, Gary Schnittjer

2006-12-23T05:25:00.000-08:00

This is a book every serious student of Scripture should own. Gary Schnittjer is a master teacher and a critical and engaging scholar. Everyone wanting to "hear" the Story of the Bible will benefit from this book while gaining skills necessary to think through and understand "the narrativity of biblical narrative."

From Amazon:

"Book Description
The Torah Story introduces the first five books of the Old Testament. A sophisticated study text written in an engaging and accessible voice, The Torah Story includes flexible study options that help students understand how these key books contribute to the ongoing story of salvation.

From the Back Cover
The first five books of the Bible begin the story of salvation. A working knowledge of these books of the Torah is essential for every serious student of the
Scriptures. The Torah Storyis a study text designed to guide the reader through the challenges of the biblical narration.

Written in an engaging and accessible voice, even while digging into difficult and complicated matters at a sophisticated level, The Torah Story moves beyond debating theories of authorship into understanding how these key books of the Bible help students understand the story of salvation. Created with flexible options for further study, each chapter includes the following:

• Questions that focus on key issues
• Key terms to watch for
• Outlines and summaries of the material
• An interactive workshop designed for students, individuals, or study groups
• Challenge questions for basic study
• Advanced questions for progressive study
• Research project suggestions
• Discussion activities using films to engage the biblical narrative (selected chapters)
• List of resources for continuing study "

A Symphonic Life

2006-11-12T15:53:00.000-08:00

In my Spiritual Disciplines class we keep a personal journal. I've really enjoyed doing this. I thought I'd share today's journal:

As I write I am listening to Leo Kotke’s album, 6 and 12 String. It is a really wonderful album full of amazing guitar picking. Even as I write I am completely engaged and loving this sound…recorded and not truly present…by a man I do not really know…experiencing only an echo of an experience. In the background I hear my wife and son talking. My wife points out the features of person in a catalogue and suggests that it looks like someone we know. I disagree and quickly return to these words. The feet of my son have been pitter-pattering throughout the house…sometimes a loud drumming and other times soft and slight. Things bump around me, cabinets open and close and all of this with a rhythm and harmony unmistakable to family life. These sounds are so familiar and so natural to my existence and life I too often do not really hear them. They occur like the sound of my own breathing which sometimes I am surprised to hear…amazed that I am in fact breathing and this is what it sounds like to be alive. And this is what it sounds like to be alive and have a family. Leo Kotke is no longer the main piece of music but rather just one sound among many creating the symphony of a life…a musical piece that God writes and has written.

Ethan and Daddy have fun taking pictures of each other...and Mama too!

2006-10-07T18:24:00.000-07:00

Kill Goliath

2006-10-06T09:11:00.000-07:00

Touch a light switch, catch a cold, study finds

2006-09-30T23:37:00.000-07:00

DUH!

Phriday Photo

2006-09-29T12:36:00.000-07:00

FIRST THINGS: On the Square

2006-09-28T15:05:00.000-07:00

I had a conversation with a very dear friend of mine once regarding the, at that time upcoming, presidential election between John Kerry and George Bush. In the conversation my friend challenged me on whether voting for a single issue such as abortion is truly a legitimate way to vote. The hinge-point for my friends argumentation turned on the observation that the direction of our country and world creates devastating social issues for our children and their future children. His question, "What kind of world we are leaving our children." It was a hard question full of recognition that many things are only getting worse globally and at home. Yesterday teaching Abstinence to a group of Catholic seniors, I asked, "Socially and culturally are things getting better or worse in America?" There response to me was, "It's getting worse." (I've also asked this in many other public High Schools and Middle Schools and received 100% the same reply) One of the Catholic students said, "Our economy is our religion. We don't really care about people anymore...they are just commodities. Ways of making other people rich."

Thinking back on my friends concern, I must say that I was affected by his passion and earnestness. I am one who lives in a constant tension of accepting that God has ordained the State, i.e. The Sword, and glad of it; that is, I am thankful that when common grace can no longer maintain peace and order, God has so designed that Rulers be in place to threaten and punish the wicked. However, I cannot argue with a clear conscience that Christians out to be the ones wielding the sword. So, I am happy that Tertullian articulated early on many agreeable things which make sense of what it means to live quietly and peacably with all men, suffering evil and waiting for God who will judge and reckon vengence.

That said, I have always voted Republican. And I have done so for usually only one reason: Pro-life/Anti-abortion convictions. That issue settles it for me. Yet, one must ask what difference that has made? Babies die daily in our country and no Republican has been able to change the law of the land regarding these murders.

Nonetheless, regardless of Roe v. Wade still holding sway over our laws, I cannot with a clear conscience vote for a Democrat who might make sense on other issues while maintaining the party plank of Pro-abortion.

Thanks to Justin Taylor over at Between Two Worlds for the heads up on a great article by Robert George. The agony of being a single issue voter is well felt and well said in this piece.

FIRST THINGS: On the Square

A quote:

""So, however much one might dislike Republican policies in other areas, it’s clear that the death toll under the Democrats would be so large as to make it unreasonable for Catholic citizens, or citizens of any faith who oppose the taking of innocent human life, to use their votes and influence to help bring the Democratic party into power."I find no cause for joy in this. I wish that it were possible for pro-life citizens legitimately to support Democratic candidates. I wish that the party of my parents and grandparents had not placed itself on the wrong side of the most profound human rights issue of our contemporary domestic politics. I wish that the killing of embryonic and fetal human beings by abortion and in biomedical research were resolutely opposed by both parties so that we could cast our votes based on our assessments of the candidates’ and parties’ competing positions on taxation, immigration, education, welfare, health-care reform, national security, and foreign policy. It is hardly satisfactory that pro-life citizens — representing a variety of views on the range of issues in economic, social, and foreign policy — find themselves bound to the Republicans because the only viable alternative is a party that has abandoned its commitment to the weakest and most vulnerable members of the human family by embracing abortion and embryo-destructive research."

Not So Back

2006-08-27T09:04:00.000-07:00

With little fanfare or notice, I am back. It is nice to go undetected, to fly below the radar, to be a face quickly forgotten, a blog hardly read...

More of less coming soon.

Living With Lawless Hearts

2006-07-28T21:48:00.000-07:00

What would happen in our world if there were no rules? What if there were no consequences for our evil? What would happen to our world if there were no laws, no international treatys, no geneva conventions, no boundry lines? What if there were no courts to insure that justice was to be upheld for the offended and against the offender? Imagine a world with no police, no law and order, no electric chairs or lethal injections.

What would people do given the ability to "get away" with it? What would you do? What is that secret desire, urge, notion or rage that you have kept down over countless days? What harnessed rage would vent into full scale slaughter? What lustful eyes would find fulfillment in remorseless rape? What greedy hands would grope the thing longed for? How many vulgar, harsh and sensual words would fill the void of verbal nicetys we use in common everyday speech?

Where does your heart wonder to given the chance? Where would your desire roam if freed from the oppressive expectations of civility and order? Where would you be? What would you do? What do you wish you could get away with? When was the last time you were faced with the very real desire of doing something you knew/felt to be inherently wrong and evil? How many days or hours or seconds have passed since that last thought pressed itself upon your desires?

I've asked this question again and again of the young in schools both middle and high school...and the answer is always the same, "If that happened then there would be no one left," or,"People would be killing and raping and stealing and doing everything they're not supposed to do." I then narrow the point and question them, "Are you saying that you yourself would be doing such things too?" The result is a wide-eyed unexpected realization of their own inward tendencies.

Two very important observations are clear from such pondering. First and most obvious, we do not live in such a lawless world. Thus, the question is only partially hypothetical. We live in a land of rules, laws, police, courts and justice. Even if we are critical or skeptical of such forms of law and government, we certainly breathe a sigh of relief knowing that there exists some sort of social barrier intended to seperate and protects us from the manifold evil desires pulsing in human hearts. This last thought brings us to the second more subtle yet more disturbing observation, evil desires dwell within us all.

We have to face the fact that we live in a land of laws, police, courts, prisons, locked doors, burglar alarms and lethal injections ultimately because we all are quite aware of something germane to humanity, namely, a desire to commit evil and get away with it. We are leary not only of others but of ourselves as well.

Signs in a bank which say, "Please stand in line and wait for the next available teller" exist precisely because deep down inside we do not really want to wait in line and certainly should not have to wait for the next available. The sign indicates something else as well, we affirm that there is a way things should go. That is, there is a way of living with others and individually which demands something above and beyond whatever our hearts desires might be.

My point in discussing all of this is to point out the problem of evil in our hearts and the problem of good in our hearts. When I say the problem of good, I mean that twist of conscience, shame or holy outrage we feel when we see evil committed against others, commit the evil ourselves or have it committed against ourselves. These are universal responses. There is not a single culture, no matter how divergent which does not have some sort of social moral code which deals with and directs human behavior. The problem of evil in our hearts arises from the sense we have in ourselves that we would like to break these rules or codes of behavior given the right combination of circumstances.

There is only one faith in the world which deals with this heart issue and it is Christianity. Traditional Judaism misses the point of the Law and misses the clear indication that the reason there is Law is because we are by heart lawbreakers, inventing ways to do evil, thus the inherent "need" for a Law. Islam enforces a code of worship and behavior based on reward and punishment, missing too the point and neglecting to ask the question, "Why do I need this leverage to induce my behavior?" Many of the Eastern religions simply reply to such questions nonsensically by saying that distinctions between good and evil are illusory, that they are somehow beyond good and evil, while never facing the fact of the question itself. That is, the fact that there is such a question itself begs to be answered and faced because we sense deep down a wrongness over evil and a rightness over good. Silly koans or a pantheistic monism will not dissolve the crisis we all sense within ourselves and view in others. We have some idea of what is good but love inwardly that which is evil. We are torn and weighted down within by such things. The undertow of our own being pulls us toward the darkness yet in many there is a longing to have their desires changed so as to love what is right and holy. And it is like an old longing to return to something we remember as better. Many have a the sense that there must have been a time when things were not as twisted out of shape as they are now..

Only Christianity states emphatically that mankind is dead in sin and tells why and what has been done about it. Christianity faces the problem squarely and tells us that many years ago when God created our first parents, that given the chance to love Him who is Holy and do the right, our first parents chose instead not to bow the head but rather to raise themselves against a Sovereign Creator. His response was as if to say, "If you consider my Love slavery then you will have this freedom from Me. I will give you over to your desire and you will be free to sin...freed from God yet slaves to sin...wherein you will never ever be fully able to love what is Holy and Good, namely, Me."

Thus we have lived a long time in this ruined city which was first built to house the Holy but was devastated by the fire of sin and left blackened and brokened...beyond human repair. Or perhaps, stated differently, we are only broken pieces of a multicolored stained glass first intended to fit within the framework of God's house, to cast His Holy light through us, shining with brilliant intensity and diversity of color in the Glory of His Son. This is the way it was supposed to be. Yet now are we fragmented and broken sitting unfulfilled longing to cast a more beautiful and pleasurable light. We settle for shades and glimpses of what was that first Light.

The sadness, anger and angst that follows such a loss has echoed throughout humanity and is heard in the longing for something better, something right, something more pure, something more holy, something more real, something redemptive and new...yet never satisfied, a hungering which leads men to numbness and dumbness of soul. Numbing ourselves with mega buffets, illicit, immoral and unnatural sex, psychotropic drugs and endless forms of entertainment, endless games, endless tv shows, endless songs and dances. We try to convince ourselves daily that our technological advances will one day herald a new Utopia somehow overcoming our unnatural bent...yet beholding that the same nuclear technology which gives energy to run our refrigerators and circulate our aircondition also gives the ingredients for weapons of mass destruction. We dumb ourselves by refusing to face the hard reality of our own souls...that apart from God in Christ, we are dead and empty, that we are miserable wanderers longing for Home.

The hope, through Christ, is that in Him we are made a new creation...new bodies, new minds, new eyes to see a new City indwelt by God Himself...enabling us to enjoy Him and love Him and obey Him...replacing the slavish fear of His Holiness with the enjoyment of a son or daughter who revels in the strength, beauty and greatness of their very own Daddy. Christ our Brother, Who died that we might be born again, makes us sons and daughters of His Father...welcomes us, loves us, satisfies us with Himself. Henceforth, we are no longer numb but rather deeply experiencing as we ought; aquiring new "taste buds" which cause us to savor and hunger for a thousand different joys in Christ. We are no longer dumb but rather faceoff and engage with a sort of critical realism ourselves and the world surrounding us.

This is our only Hope.

(I am indebted to Dr. Jim Cofield for the idea of stained glass as an analogy to our falleness)

*note: these thoughts came quickly today. As stated in the previous post my intention is to be quiet and think and read and pray...and wait in silence for the Lord. Today was fruitful and I felt obliged to share this.

I Will Be Quiet For A Time

2006-07-27T19:42:00.000-07:00

Psalm62:5

My soul, wait in silence for God only, For my hope is from Him.

Sermon Jams, Or, Preaching With A Back Beat

2006-07-16T00:13:00.000-07:00

...you never know exactly where you will end up. Here is a Chat dialogue i had on a website that deals in instrumental beats. I found the site as a result of taking a link from somewhere (I don't remember where I found the link) to a site called relevantrevolution.com.

Now, this is a site which features really strong rap beats with haunting pianos, strings and synth sounds underneath even better preaching...like John Piper and Ravi Zacharias and many others.
The most ironic thing about all of my interest is that one day I opened a web site that had the most beautiful piano loop I'd ever heard. Prior to opening that site with the piano loop I had started a sermon by John Piper from another web site biblicalpreaching.info. Well the two together was amazing. I mean it felt very right. There were times when the music seemed to follow the intensity of the preaching and seemed that the tempo of Piper's preaching matched the music. It was a very moving effect.

So, when I found this link I couldn't believe that people had even thought to put music and preaching together intentionally. Mine experience was very unintentional at least from my point of view.

Well, I go to the web site and they have a chat screen you can interact with while listening to the music. One of the chatters was a person who goes by the name BlackFaith. I thought, "Hmmm, maybe there is something religious to this...Here is the result of my inquiry:
BlackFaith : anyone here?
KeltyBroadstone : blackfaith?
KeltyBroadstone : Is that a religious thing?
BlackFaith : no
KeltyBroadstone : mean anything?
BlackFaith : Black Faith is the name of one of my beats and it sounded good with productions at the end so i was like hey why not
BlackFaith : wut about you? you make music?
KeltyBroadstone : no, i preach...so maybe in a different way
BlackFaith : oh i see
KeltyBroadstone : there is a thing called sermonjams, messages/spokenWORD put to beats...it's a trip...relevantrevol ution.com...
BlackFaith : im not into gospel music
KeltyBroadstone : check it out...especially J.Piper on suffer...dude it aint gospel...i aint into no gospel...this is the beats from places like this...seriously check it out...you aint nvr hrd this b4
BlackFaith : ok
KeltyBroadstone : they got m.king jr with a beat underneath "i got a dream..."
BlackFaith : its interesting
KeltyBroadstone : are you listening now?
BlackFaith : yeah
BlackFaith : im listening to the one called king
BlackFaith : its wierd cuz you got these gangster a** beats and then you have preaching on top of it
KeltyBroadstone : yeah, i love it man...
BlackFaith : lol
KeltyBroadstone : you got to be feeling that!
KeltyBroadstone : go to vol.1 and listen to the Ravi on Truth...that'll blow your mind
BlackFaith : its not on my favorites list...but its interesting...
BlackFaith : idk...i think its funny
KeltyBroadstone : what's funny about it?
BlackFaith : idk its just so wierd to me that its funny
KeltyBroadstone : does it feel wrong to have beats like that with preaching?
BlackFaith : idk kinda...you should have like...RnB ish music...light beats...i mean these are gangta a** beats and u got preaching on top of it...usually they dont mix
BlackFaith : although part of the funny thing is is that i know all of the beats by shadowville
KeltyBroadstone : there is a deep serious inthe gangsta sound...like you better listen to me...and the preaching on top of this beat is saying the same thing
BlackFaith : idk i still think its wierd
BlackFaith : but diff people have diff tastes
Enzo : yeah i just read all of that
BlackFaith : lol
Enzo : never heard of it, but it doesn't sound appealing to me
KeltyBroadstone : that's why i like it...that haunting dark sound is God knocking at your door saying turn from sin, wake up, God is real and there will be a real judgment...so maybe it'll get inside your head and start rattling around
Enzo : but
Enzo : with a message that serious
Enzo : it shouldn't require music behind it to keep the the person listening
Enzo : i dunno, just sounds strange to me
BlackFaith : true
Enzo : if people really believe in their religion, then it shouldn't require "antics" to keep it interesting
KeltyBroadstone : God gave us gifts and talents...why not use it with his message?
BlackFaith : wut would really catch someones attention...idk if it would be in a good way or bad...would be if you had a preacher pull a lil jon
Enzo : i just don't think putting someone's sermon over a beat does anything
KeltyBroadstone : MC hammer tried that and came off real bad
Enzo : if a preacher is a good speaker, he knows how to keep the audiences attention
Enzo : he knows how to keep the listener interested, and makes the listener want to stay there to find out more
KeltyBroadstone : the preachers are not having this done...this is independent of them
Enzo : and he can do all of that w/out any music whatsoever
Enzo : i know
Enzo : because they don't need it
Enzo : i don't know, it just sounds weird to me
BlackFaith : i agree with Enzo
Enzo : i just don't understand mixing "gangster" beats with a sermon
Enzo : it's kinda like christian heavy metal
Enzo : it just doesn't make sense
KeltyBroadstone : I hear you on this...I like the preachers with and without the music...I think if the music takes away...the music has to fit...otherwise it don't mk sense
BlackFaith : lol i think they have that somewhere on soundclick
Enzo : just sounds like somebody is real bored when they start putting sermons on beats
BlackFaith : lol
Enzo : and i'm not hating on religion
KeltyBroadstone : are you guys responding as christians concerned with the purity of the gospel message...or does this just sound like christians trying to be hard
Enzo : no
Enzo : it just sounds like a waste of time
Enzo : and just strange, to mix that w/ a beat
BlackFaith : especially that type of beat
Enzo : yeah
Enzo : maybe a slow r&b song or just some nice piano
KeltyBroadstone : that might just be your connotation...gangst a and jesus? sounds strange...I don't usually listen to any gangsta rap but the music "felt" serious and fit the seriuosness of the message
BlackFaith : wut does connotation mean?
Enzo : connotation
Enzo : is like
KeltyBroadstone : funny you say that b/c a lot of thse beats have piano
Enzo : the way you view it
KeltyBroadstone : connotation means certain words bring out certains feelings or as enzo said, ways of seeng things
BlackFaith : i think he meant just plain piano
KeltyBroadstone : ok, well now you are just expressing your preference...that's cool...my concern ultimately is the message...if you don't like the music withit then that's cool
BlackFaith : its not that we dont like the music...we just dont think they mix very well
KeltyBroadstone : I'm probably able to enjoy the beats and the message b/c i don't have enough experience/knowledge of the gangsta background to the beats...so i get to hear the music w/out tripping over the 'connotation" of gangsta and God which is right in the sense of most gangsta is sex/drugs/violence all of which God will judge...so I think maybe i hear you on this
Enzo : yeah i just don't see it mixing well
KeltyBroadstone : my wife got mad at me today b/c i was grooving with the music with the preacing on top and she said i shouldn't be groovin like that to a sermon that maybe it was disrespectful to the preacher and to God...what do you think?
BlackFaith : i dont think preachings are groove-to-able
KeltyBroadstone : I think there are lot of Christians who really love Jesus and just want to be able to express it musically without losing the truth and demand of the Gospel
BlackFaith : i think every group of people have their ways of expressing their love to Jesus but when they mix it just doesnt workout so well
KeltyBroadstone : i think that is sad to say that
BlackFaith : why is that?
Enzo : i'm done w/ this topic
Enzo : this is just pointless
BlackFaith : lol
KeltyBroadstone : God reigns over all the people of all the earth...why should we be so biased to our own culture
Enzo : everyone has their own opinion
Enzo : all i was trying to say
Enzo : was that i find it strange that people mix sermons and rap beats
Enzo : that's all
Enzo : and i think most people would agree, because that's not exactly somethin you hear everyday
BlackFaith : i agree with enzo again lol
KeltyBroadstone : ok, i heard that...not a pointless topic...especially since the message matters so much...God/humanity/ sin/cross/grace/judg ement
KeltyBroadstone : but, yeah, i'm sure it sounds strange to some
BlackFaith : most
KeltyBroadstone : ok, most...either way you guys have to deal with the message...you exist..have a sense of sin in your own hearts...and need for forgiveness...and purpose and hope inlife...so, forget the music, God is still speaking
BlackFaith : ok well ill bbl i gotta go call my gf
KeltyBroadstone : this is an easy conversation until you start talking Jesus and sin and the need for repentance and salvation...i care most about that...thanks for the conversation I got to go too...grace and peace to you both...KELLY BRIDENSTINE

So, that was it. I am not completely happy with all of my responses and questions...but that is real time. Some of the dialogue might seem a bit jumbled but we were all feeding into the same thing at the same time.

Several things stick out. First, they did not like Jesus or preaching mixed with gangsta beats. That just felt wrong and did not make sense. Second, they did not want to talk about the message but rather that the Message has no place on their instrumental beat turf and I would challenge that. Third, it seemed like a genuine conversation. Fourth, they did not have patience or interest in getting to the message of the Gospel.

I landed pretty hard in the last line...no one responded after I made that comment. I checked back awhle ago and found that BlackFaith was still on line and had left a few words to another guy, but I left him alone.

Well, pray for these two guys. My sense is that the do not know Jesus as Lord. Perhaps they'll listen to a few more sermons witthe beats underneath and the Lord might be pleased to rescue them.

OR, maybe they'll hear a sermon with no music and God will open their eyes. I had actually thought of burning some of the sermonjams to disc for a few of my coworkers and get their response and hope the Gospel would get to them. My dialogue tonight makes me think otherwise or at least a bit more cautiously.

This is interesting and distressing as I consider and have considered very recently what is involved in being "relevant." I mean, my goodness, the website that has the beats is called "Relevant Revolution." And then, perhaps most ironically, the website has a resource section which promotes mainly John Piper material. Ironic to that is the upcoming DG conference (i want to go if someone will pay my way...but i'm not begging) in which the topic will have to do with Above All Earthly Powers: The Supremacy of Christ in a Postmodern World.

Writing in his invitation to the conference Piper describes this years theme as coming from David Wells book, Above All Earthly Powers. He expresses some of his concern and writes,

"The burden of Wells’ book is first to understand the postmodern world, and then to confront that world with the never-changing Christ. His thesis is that the West today is not simply a product of Enlightenment ideology, with its rejection of authority and reliance on reason without revelation, but is also the product of a process of consumeristic, technological, media-driven modernization that created an experience of reality which affirms and reinforces that ideology.

One effect of this modernization has been to give rise to the centrality of the psychologically oriented self in the place of a morally oriented human nature. The postmodern, all-consuming "self"—with its self-made spirituality—is subject to no outside authority. All reality has contracted into this self. It is radically individualized and privatized and insistently therapeutic. It does not feel at home in the doctrines and traditions of religion. It is on an endless quest for the enhancement of its experience measured by itself alone. "All of this has produced soil throughout society that positively invites the new spirituality. It seems normal and natural. That is why it is as difficult for the church to contest today as was Gnosticism in the early centuries" (p. 138)."

Now, I tend towards being critical and worried by the emergent church trends and the silliness of a lot of mimicing the culture. I blasted recently on the Provocations and Pantings website about this. And I think I found my criticism validated in both BlackFaith and Enzo's comments...especially Enzo's comment of the absurdity of Christian Metal...and I feel that way too...but, then I wonder about my enjoyment and, can i say it, edification with some of these sermon/songs.

Interestingly enough though, I still really enjoy hearing Ravi and Piper in this way. Does it translate to the culture and thus share the gospel? Well, in one sense it is absolutely orthodox. I can think of no other Pastor/Preacher/Speaker than Ravi and Piper in this regard. Mainly because they are so precise and devastatingly clear in engaging the culture and sharing powerfully the message of Jesus Christ. There are other speakers on this sermonjams that I am not that crazy about especially Tony Evans "Life" over the beat...he talks about Frankenstein with a beat that is a bit laughable.

This is from the founder of SermonJams, John Mahshie,

"John Mahshie is the founder of Relevant Revolution and Sermon Jams. He began Sermon Jams and Relevant Revolution with the goal of promoting a reverence and passion for the supremacy of Jesus Christ and his Kingdom. He has a passion for the current generation and believes that today is a good day to start a revolution for Christ.

We have many ideas on how these sites can be used to glorify the Lord and believe they have tremendous potential to spread gospel seeds. Sermon Jams is a Sermon/Hip-hop hybrid designed to create a medium that is biblical, tactful and relevant to our current culture. We do not take a particular position on non-essential peripheral issues such as the apostolic gifts, eschatology or adult baptism. Our focus is on the fundamental truths of the Christian faith and the Word of God. This ministry emphasizes unity on the essentials, liberty on the non-essentials and charity in everything. We believe strongly on the idea that unity does not equal uniformity because there is diversity in the Kingdom of Christ."

Anyway, I thank the Lord for the conversation tonight.

Grace and Peace,
Kelly

Conversations for Conversions Sake 2

2006-07-08T19:23:00.000-07:00

Back in the 80's I met a man named M.A. Thomas. He gave me a book about himself called, "M.A. Thomas A Man With A Heart As Big India." I was just a young teen. He preached quite mightily and passionately. He spoke of persecution. He spoke of his love for Jesus.

I read today about his son, Dr. Samuel Thomas, who "According to Hopegivers International,...was arrested March 16, 2006, in New Delhi, by about a dozen men claiming to be police officers from the provincial capital of Kota, Rajasthan. Hopegivers International was formed in the United States by friends wanting to support the many orphanages and schools founded by Dr. Thomas’ father M. A. Thomas as he began ministering to children in India. Local anti-Christian hate groups continue their siege against the 2,500 orphans and abandoned children protected at the Emmanual Hope Home in Kota, Rajasthan, by threatening to disrupt water and electric service to the facilities. Bishop M. A. Thomas is currently in hiding from the Hindu extremist groups that have offered large rewards for the capture and beheading of Dr. Samuel Thomas or his father M.A. Thomas. "

I read that and realize that the very light frustrations I have sharing the gospel are nothing compared to many trials of my brothers and sisters in other lands. I also think about the reactions of those I have been sharing the gospel with. God has been pleased to open dozens of conversations in the last few weeks of working at UPS. I listed descriptions in the last posts. What I have not talked about is the tension my conversations are creating. I have had varying feelings about this. I have thought how easy it would be "to just get along" and not say anything about Jesus. I had one young man literally sneering at me and cussing as I told him that Jesus was the only way to God the Father. He shouted that he didn't need a mediator and I was wrong about this. I gave him Pascal's wager and said, "Well, if I am wrong I don't lose anything. If you are wrong you lose everything." He responded, "Lose what?! You don't know what I'll lose. You've not died before. Have you died and know for sure what's happens?! You don't know anything!" He blasphemed the Lord, but I said to those who were listening, "You ought to be careful, we're going to be judged for everything we've said in this van tonight. Me and you, each one of us. Some to torment, some to life." He laughed and said, "No, I think God thinks what I said was funny!" He then held his hands like a phone, as thought speaking with God, and said, "Yeah, that was funny wasn't it!"

And my heart breaks for him. He simply doesn't get it. I have spoken to others who say his reaction is one of inner conviction. That is, the reason he reacts to vehemently is because he is under conviction from the Holy Spirit. That may be so, but he resists and blasphemes. God open his eyes.

Another woman on the van said that I was wrong about the New Testament and that after a lot of study she has concluded that the Bible, especially the New Testament is completely unreliable. She mentioned all of the books that were left out and how distorted and questionable that history is. I explained to her that by 100 AD the New Testament was basically complete. And thus, the councils which canonized the books were not doing so arbitrarily but rather simply codifying what was already seen as divinely inspired writings. I told her that there were over 5000 greek manuscripts and some of the fragments we have are dated within 200 years of the originals. Her response to these things was to get very angry and said, "Kelly, I don't care. You're not going to change my mind on this. I don't believe what you are saying. I don't want to argue about this. You believe what you believe and I believe what I believe." I tried to say as delicately as I could, so as not to rouse her more, "You made the statement that you had studied. You said that the documents are unreliable. I'm simply trying to demonstrate that the writings are reliable." She shook her head and walked off the van.

Is this persecution? No way. This is Mars Hill and the Athenians are sneering. That is all. Nonetheless, it is vexing.

The next day I was sitting in the waiting area of an office reading Calvin on these things. Here is what he said,

"For my part, although I do not excel either in great dexterity or eloquence, if I were struggling against the most crafty sort of despisers of God, who seek to appear shrewd and witty in disparaging Scripture, I am confident it would not be difficult for me to silence their clamorous voices. And if it were a useful labor to refute their cavils, I would with no great trouble shatter the boasts they mutter in their lurking places. But even if anyone clears God's Sacred Word from man's evil speaking, he will not at once imprint upon their hearts that certainty which piety requires. Since for unbelieving men religion seems to stand by opinion alone they in order not to believe anything foolishly or lightly, both wish and demand rational proof that Moses and the prophets spoke divinely. But I reply: the testimony of the Spirit is more excellent than all reason. For as God alone is a fit witness of himself in his Word, so also the Word will not find acceptance in men's hearts before it is sealed by the inward testimony of the Spirit. The same Spirit, therefore, who has spoken through the mouths of the prophets must penetrate into our hearts to persuade us that they faithfully proclaimed what had been divinely commanded." Calvin, Institutes vol.1 VII. 4

So again, I ask you, please pray for the conversations I have been having at UPS. I am not the only one having these conversations. My blogger friend Timmy works at UPS as well in another area. He has mentioned many fruitful conversations he has had as well. So I am not alone and God is working here and all over the world. In fact my brother Lee, has been out west sharing and living the gospel among the lost and needy there at the Yakama reservation.

Are you sharing the gospel at your workplace? Are you afraid of losing your job? Are you worried of losing credibility or your coworkers sneering at you? Are you afraid of being labled a "Jesus Freak" or a "Funamentalist Wacko"? Do others at work even know you are a Believer? Would others know to come to you if they wanted to know how to be saved?

I had a conversation with a friend who mentioned a certain lack of vitality in his knowledge of Christ. I said, "Put yourself out there where you have to risk something. Make yourself do those things which require faith and trust." I mentioned to him 2 Cor 3 and told him, "Man, I am not adequate for these things. I have to trust that God is the one who will open their eyes. He calls me to open my mouth. But it is scarey because I don't know what people are going to say, but I know it is Him who does it." I was overcome with joy for all of the conversations I have had lately, to be able to share the Gospel...and to be sneered at! God appointed for me to be sneered at and laughed at! And again I felt the confirmation of the Lord, He has made me to proclaim with joyful, loving intensity that Jesus Christ is Lord!

Maranatha!

Kelly

Conversations for Conversion Sake, An Ongoing Series That Will Chronicle My Experiences in Sharing the Gospel

2006-07-01T23:21:00.000-07:00

Conversations for Conversion Sake, An Ongoing Series That Will Chronicle My Experiences in Sharing the Gospel

Let me give some context. I work on a 3rd shift crew of eight other people. We drive around an airport ramp loading planes all night. It is actually a very fun job. Quick sprints between planes, loading "cans", driving belt loaders, pulling dollies with tugs. Wearing flourescent yellow smocks that have reflective stripes. As a crew we ride around in an old UPS delivery truck which has been gutted and now has van seats bolted to the floor against the side of one wall. The other side of the truck has two shelves. These are convenient and lengthy enough to hold four resting bodies. So...we spend lots of time in the truck...hurrying up to wait. This affords lots of time for conversation.

I will begin posting parts of conversations which tend toward God and the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

I need prayers. You may or may not know me. Regardless, pray for me. I am saying to anyone who reads this, "Pray for me." Beyond and in addition to that leave comments to help me think through the conversations. That is, if you think I blew it, then tell me. If I "accidentally" said something brilliant, then give God the glory and let me know about it. If you have advice on what could have been said, or might be said in future conversation then by all means chime in.

I wonder if we did this sort of thing on Wednesday or Sunday nights if it wouldn't lead to more fruitful conversations and conversions. What would happen if on Wed night the goal was to walk through and talk through the witnessing we'd done through the week and began praying and strategising through how to continue in the next opportunity? What kind of learning and inspiration would churches begin to experience in "evangelism" if we simply started these kinds of bull sessions, brainstorming sessions, critical assessment sessions?

My goals in this ongoing series is to get prayers for them and for me. My other goal is to encourage you to be bold in your witness. The world forces its way very boldly on us and them. Why not respond with even more boldness for Christ. I am already a "Jesus Freak" to my crew. Others might argue for some milder form of "friendship evangelism" to which I would reply, "This is friendship evangelism!! I love them and they know it! I am honest. To the point. There is no second guessing whether I am a follower of Jesus Christ. I smell like death to most of them but I smell like Life to others!"

A conversation with the black man, I was talking to the young Christian about what I taught in the abstinence classes...the infamous 4 questions,1- Why do you and everything else exist? 2-What does it mean to be human? 3-Why is there Good and Evil? 4-How do you know your answers to these questions are True? I was telling young Christian that I wanted to tack on some others questions which include, 5-Why do we demand and hope for Justice? 6-What is with this deep longing for happiness? 7-What/Why is guilt? The black man at this point asked, "Have you been reading Plato?" I was pretty suprised by the question and said,"No, but why do you ask?" He said, "That sounds like what he talked about. Especially, the what is happiness question. That sounds just like him." I nodded. He asked, "Do you like Plato? Have you read him?" I said, "Yes, I enjoyed reading Plato, that is I enjoyed the dialogues with Socrates. Socrates is a lot of fun. He asks good and hard questions." He nodded but I could tell that he hadn't ever read Plato but had obviously heard about or been taught some sort of overview of Plato. So, I went on to say, "You know what interesting is that the manuscripts we have of Plato's Socratic Dialogues are miniscule compared to the New Testament." He looked interested so I went on, "Yeah, most people have no problem accepting that both Plato and Socrates both existed and what they said is contained in the writings. But, people flip out as to whether Jesus ever existed or whether He really said what the Bible says He said. There are over 5000 manuscripts which are amazingly consistent and only differing in relation to use of some words. There is not a single doctrine or truth which is called into question with any one of these differences."

Of Pagans and the Work Place

2006-06-16T22:03:00.000-07:00

I have started a new job. Tonight I finished class room training and will begin next week with my "crew" for several weeks of probationary working. Essentially I'll make it to seniority as long as I don't run over anyone, don't run into anything, wear the right shoes, show up to work, show up on time to work and do the job.

I know several guys who work at a different location for the same company doing a different function. They and many of those they work with are fellow seminarians. I would have been heading in the same general direction had an oportunity to work on "the ramp" not happened.

As it is, I work with only one fellow brother in the Lord. The rest are quite clearly pagans. I would imagine there are other seminarians on the ramp. I hope to meet them.

I thought it would be interesting to quote some conversations and interactions I've had:

The guy who sat beside me in training:

The smell of cigarettes came wafting into the room and I said, "I'm going to shut the door. That cigarette smoke stinks." Looking over to him, "Do you smoke?"

He said, "Yeah."

I said, "That'll kill you. I'm telling you, I used to smoke and it is nasty stuff. It'll kill you."

He said, "Oh, well."

I said, "So you don't mind living your last days choking on your lungs?"

He said, "We're all going to die. Why not get there quicker."

I said, "Ok, but then what?"

He said, "Huh, you're dead."

I said, "You're just dead? That's it? What's after that?"

He said, "I don't know, I guess just nothing."

I said, "If there were judgement or something to fear afterwards would that change how you live now?"

He said, "Yeah."

Another conversation with later in the week:

I asked, "Did you get your check?"

He said, "Nope."

I joked, "It's a conspiracy. The government is doing this on purpose."

He said, "Yeah, you're probably right. I hate the government. If I had the chance I would kill George Bush.

I exclaimed, "What!? You'd do what?"

He said, very confidently, "I mean it, if I had the chance I'd put a %$#@!*^ bullet in his head. He's screwed up the country. I wish Bill Clinton was still president."

I shook my head and said, "I'll be glad when Jesus comes back. He's the real King."

He said, "I don't believe in Jesus."

I said, "He believes in you."

He said, "I mean, I'm an atheist."

I said, "Well, He isn't."

He said, "I don't know anything and I don't care about anything."

I said, "Well you better hope you're right in atheism, because He is very sure and He does care."

He got very quiet and thoughtful. If God led you here and you happen to read my post, then pray for this guy. I'll see him a lot on the job. We have a good comradery so understand that the conversation we had was in a very relaxed and friendly context. He isn't avoiding me now as a result. In fact, I think it safer to talk about most anything.

I am hopeful of the Lord's work at this job. Pray for me that I would be filled with energy to do the job and do it well (it's 3rds). Pray that I would have wise judgement in choosing my words with others. To be more afraid of God's rebuke at not taking the opportunities than of the rebuke of those I plead with.

parable of a preacher

2006-03-23T19:43:00.000-08:00

An Edward's quote regarding true and false religion...

2006-03-23T19:18:00.000-08:00

". . .till we have learned well to distinguish between true and false religion, between saving affections and experiences, and those manifold fair shows, and glistering appearances, by which they are counterfeited; the consequences of which, when they are not distinguished, are often inexpressibly dreadful. By this means the devil gratifies himself, by bringing to pass, that that should be offered to God, by multitudes, under a notion of a pleasing acceptable service to him, that is indeed above all things abominable to him. By this means, he deceives great multitudes about the state of their souls; making them think they are something, when they are nothing; and so eternally undoes'em: and not only so, but establishes many, in a strong confidence of their eminent holiness, who are in God's sight, some of the vilest hypocrites. By this means, he many ways, damps and wounds religion in the hearts of saints, obscures and deforms it by corrupt mixtures, causes their religious affections woefully to degenerate, and sometimes for considerable time, to be like manna, that bred worms and stank . . . And by what is seen of the terrible consequences of this counterfeit religion, when not distinguished from true religion, God's people in general have their minds unhinged and unsettled, in things of religion, and know not where to set their foot, or what to think or do; and many are brought into doubts, whether there be anything at all in religion; and heresy, and infidelity, and atheism greatly prevail." Jonathan Edwards, preface to Religious Affections, 1746

The Reality of Satan and the Fall of Man

2006-03-23T19:16:00.000-08:00

The title is important. The reality of satan’s existence is a powerful fact in the Garden. The fact of satan’s reality in the garden seems ample enough argument for believing his lie. Think of it in terms of this, here is one who is openly defying the Lord God and yet is still alive. This is a powerful reality. And this fact brings to question the validity of God’s statement. Several things begin to be in question, “how can God allow such a being to continue in existence?" With energy, cunning and vitality he challenges the very rule and the very interpretation of that law which demands death for disobedience and yet this serpent lives. How can this be?

Perhaps if such defiance does not result in death then neither would defiance against eating of this fruit. Again, the argument is compelling and strengthening.

Only if God is not believed to be as He has so far appeared to be, i.e. the Sovereign God of all creation and from whom obedience is demanded, can this be so. Existence, which derives from God, becomes part of the argument against God. Satan is alive and well. He is real and he exists. The facts seem to mitigate against God’s sovereign rule in the universe. Things do not appear to be as obedient to Him as He claims they ought to be. The dragon asks, “Who is He to make such demands?” (which questions God’s character) He has not stopped this being from open defiance. (which questions God’s power). This being gives me choice in the matter. (which questions the sovereign rule and legitimacy of obedience to God).

That which is seen becomes more convincing than what is unseen. Where is the omni-present God? It is not merely the silence of Adam which is compelling but most certainly the silence of God. The lusts of the eyes (the fruit is appealing and the existence of very real opposition to God) the pride of life (i exist and no one stops me in my choice, I decide whether God is a liar and a lie) and the lust of the flesh (what I can see, feel, taste, touch; that which is sensate is ultimate reality and the definer of what is true).

We repeat these things daily.

He's got a gun...

2006-03-23T19:14:00.000-08:00

I love my wife. She is wonderful. I am blessed. I read Proverbs 18:22 tonight and wow, it is so true. I have been favored of God to be blessed with her as my body and soul mate. These past two days I think I have told her at least 300 times, "I Love You!" I thank God for giving me a heart to love like this.

I love my son. He is five years old. Today we played hide and seek in the park. He covered his eyes and began counting. I ran behind a tree directly behind the bench he was leaning over to count. I waited, hoping he would not notice me and he didn't. I watched him turn in the opposite direction. He began walking with his fingers pointing like a pretend pistol. He edged close to each tree, inspecting slowly, no doubt prepared to engage in close quarter combat. I suppressed laughter as I watched him. As he continued to other trees I could see as he looked around a look of concern. He was talking to himself, pointing "with frightful seriousness his little finger". In some sense I was testing him, letting him feel alone-ness in the wood. I didn't want to scare him . Yet, I wanted to see what sort of response he would give to the situation. His confidence and seriousness were inspiring. He continued on to each tree with utter intensity, full of hope that this tree would be the tree which hid his father. I loved the fact that he wanted to find me. I watched his smile. He was thoroughly enjoying himself, but I was noticing that his frustration at not finding me. And the concern on his face was beginning to show more. So, I crept very quietly until, SNAP!, a twig broke. He wheeled around, pistol-finger pointing, squeeling with laughter and shouted, "Daddy! I got you!"

It was a wonderful time.

God is good.

A wonderful Baxter quote

2006-03-23T19:13:00.000-08:00

This is a wonderful quote from the voluminous Puritan Richard Baxter. This is from his work Saint's Everlasting Rest.

"What weight and worth is there in every passage of the blessed Gospel! enough, one would think, to enter and pierce the dullest soul, and wholly possess its thoughts and affections; and yet how oft does it fall as water upon a stone! The things of God which we handle, are divine; but our manner of handling is human. There is little we touch, but we leave the print of our fingers behind. If God speaks the word himself, it will be a piercing, melting word indeed. The Christian now knows, by experience, that his most immediate joys are his sweetest joys; which have least of man, and are most directly from the Spirit. Christians who are much in secret prayer and contemplation, are men of greatest life and joy; because they have all more immediately from God himself. Not that we should cast off hearing, reading, and conference, or neglect any ordinance of God; but to live above them while we use them, is the way of a Christian. There is joy in these remote receivings; but the fulness of joy is in God’s immediate presence. We shall then have light without a candle, and perpetual day without the sun for “the city has no need of the sun, neither of the moon to shine in it; for the glory of God lightens it, and the Lamb is the light thereof; there shall be no night there, and they need no candle, neither light of the sun; and they shall reign for ever and ever.”"

You can also read the entire book online at Christian Classics Ethereal Library:
http://www.ccel.org/ccel/baxter/saints_rest.pdf

up on a roof...

2006-03-23T19:09:00.000-08:00

(I am posting old blogs from a previous blogsite, which i no longer use, because it has adds which make a man fall....otherwise the posts here, I think, may be worth keeping and sharing.)

I was sitting on a roof recently and was watching the clouds, large and majestic moved by the wind. The sun seemed to fight for attention and place in the sky, but in its efforts only added to the colorful movements of billowing waves of air and water.
These words came quickly and nearly left and changed as the clouds I was watching:

The clouds are answering
the call of God
to take flight and move
They are gathering where He bids them be
In Him
they move
and have
their being
Before our eyes
a watching world
sees the purposes of God
blindly
And we do not interpret
rightly

On preaching sin and grace to sinners like myself...

2006-03-23T19:05:00.000-08:00

Some of my greatest effect/affect on others regarding sin and grace is when and because of God's deepest dealings in my own soul. As the Holy Spirit opens to me the lies of my own heart, the underlying lustings of my motives and the consequences of my own words and actions and thoughts, then and most only then am I able to aim with masterful accuracy that lethal grace which intends to nullify the effects of and kill the life of sin in myself and others.
Others must feel in my speaking and preaching and living that I truly do know where sin hides and they must feel within themselves sin, itself, that evil principle, rise up with horror as God's truth comes through the windows of the eyes and the side-doors of the ears. Their souls must either anguish as they struggle to find new places within themselves to hide their sin or they must rather rejoice and triumph as their sin, which once was hiding insides themselves is found out, cast out and given a public execution.

Television

2006-03-14T17:31:00.000-08:00

Here is a recent article I read:

Channel 23
By: Michael Pearl
A modern Psalm taken from “The New International Unchristian Perversion.”
“The TV is my shepherd, I shall not want anything else. It maketh me to lie down on the sofa. It leadeth me away from the Scripture. It destroys my soul. It leadeth me in the paths of sex and violence for the sponsors sake, Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will enjoy the evil, for blood and sex they excite me. It’s cable and remote they comfort me. It prepares a commercial before me in the presence of my children. It anoints my head with humanism, My coveting runneth over. Surely laziness and ignorance shall follow my family all the days of our lives, and we shall dwell in the house watching TV forever.”
But don’t worry parents, as you know the TV doesn’t have any influence on the children of parents who don’t want it to influence them. That’s why the sponsors only advertise products you have already decided to buy.